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Siamese Twin Sisters To Split! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (23 hours old)

In what has turned out to be quite a shocking story, Siamese twin sisters Alecia and Gabrio Chinzano are to split up over an apparent illicit affair. Alecia Chinzano had been seeing boyfriend, To… more

Flying Pig Spotted Over Scarborough! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (1 day old)

Approximately 200 people spotted a flying pig over Scarborough yesterday. The event occurred at around 13:30hrs and said pig continued to soar about for approximately thirty minutes, much to the ama… more

Teenager Seen Using Public Phone! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (1 day old)

Embarrassed- fifteen-year-old, Katie Price, was spotted making a call from a public phone booth yesterday evening. "Look my mobile just freaked out on me, honest it did!" she pleaded to passers-… more

New Nostradamus Predictions Found! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (1 day old)

Prophecies made by Nostradamus, uncovered for the first time since the 16th century, state that Uri Gellar is actually set to rise to prominence in the world of astrophysics, and become one of the m… more

The Illness Debate Continues! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (2 days old)

Once upon a time and not that long ago, the UK just had to worry about its raging drug problem. Now, there is a new social plague hitting our streets, and it is people who deal and take illness pure… more

Masked Raider Strikes Again. From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (2 days old)

The Masked Raider of Swansea, known locally as “The Masked Raider of Swansea” and nationally as “The Masked Raider of Swansea” yesterday spoke out against people who tease ants by laying a trail of … more

Exercising with Osteoporosis From tel1342 ^Pro in Back Troubles (2 days old)

If you have osteoporosis, you might mistakenly think exercise will lead to fracture. In fact, though, using your muscles helps protect your bones. Osteoporosis is a major cause of disability in … more

Cringey From Jembajr ^Pro in The Sozzled Mumble (2 days old)

Had my interview there. It was a bit cringey. :**: I didn't get to say everything that I wanted to say - the lady talked a lot and I found myself trying to interject with witty and interesting poin… more

US Flag Satanical? From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (3 days old)

A study conducted here in the UK by professional scientists who wish to remain anonymous due to the controversial nature of their findings, discovered that many features of the American flag were Sa… more

Tagged From neonmeatdreams in Ask or Answer. (3 days old)

I have just received a private message rom blog.co.uk telling me I have been tagged with 'dancing'. What does this mean? Does this happen to everyone or has someone done this just to me? I don't t… more

Prince Harry to Command SAS. From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (3 days old)

Whitehall – London: In a press conference today arranged at the UK Ministry of Defence, Brigadier General Sir Spencer Cameron confirmed growing speculation that Prince Harry (third in line to the Br… more

Santa Claus Forced To Outsource! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (3 days old)

NORTH POLE (Bloomberg Report)-Prohibitive production problems and local labour loopholes have forced Old Nic’s little helpers to seek alternative budgetary strategies or else cease global toy distri… more

Life Guard found Dead in Bath Tub. From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (3 days old)

Swansea: South Wales: - In what appears to be life's greatest irony, Broderick Griffiths, a 33 years old lifeguard who dedicated his whole life to save others, was found dead by his wife Gwaeddan in… more

C of E to Reinstate Blood Sacrifice! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (4 days old)

The Most Reverend and Right Honourable Dr. Rowan Williams is the 104th Archbishop of Canterbury. This morning speaking at the General Synod Meeting being held at the Memorial Hall, St Peter's Colleg… more

Projectile Vomiting New Olympic Event 2012! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (4 days old)

London Mayor Boris Johnson today announced that the British Olympic Committee for 2012 have introduced Projectile Vomiting as an Olympic event. "It makes perfect sense" said Boris "there's plent… more

Er...you've got your hands in your trousers? From neonmeatdreams in Ask or Answer. (5 days old)

Can some kind person take the time to explain to me exactly why increasing amounts of younger gentlemen(and others not so young), who we have come to know as chavs and the like, seem to be walking aro… more

From neonmeatdreams in Ask or Answer. (5 days old)

Can some kind person take the time to explain to me exactly why increasing amounts of younger gentlemen(and others not so young), who we have come to know as chavs and the like, seem to be walking aro… more

Syringomyelia-Spinal Cyst From tel1342 ^Pro in Back Troubles (5 days old)

Syringomyelia (sih-ring-go-my-E-lee-uh) is the development of a fluid-filled cyst (syrinx) within your spinal cord. Over time, the cyst may enlarge, damaging your spinal cord and causing pain, w… more

Alan Johnson Defends Prof Nutt Sacking! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (5 days old)

Home Secretary Alan Johnson says Prof David Nutt went against a "long established" government principle by telling the truth. Two members of the Advisory Council on the Misuse of Drugs have resi… more

Osama Bin-Laden joins Masonic Lodge! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (5 days old)

One time international terrorist and all-round bad boy, "Ossybin" has now fully integrated with Worcestershire Society by joining the regional Masonic Lodge. "He will be a great asset", enthuse… more

Afghan "Leader" Hamid Karzai bans The Dead Synapses Society! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (6 days old)

Afghanistan’s Unpopular b*stard, puppet-President Hamid Karzai, has taken another drastic step in his clampdown on any form of criticism of his regime by shutting down all internet cafe's which prov… more

The Road coming soon From neonmeatdreams in (6 days old)

Look out for 'The Road' coming out soon starring Viggo Mortensen. The film is based on the book of the same name by Cormac McCarthy. He has two other film adaptions of his works 'No Country for Old Me… more

Vote for me and... From neonmeatdreams in Armchair Revolutionaries (6 days old)

Some people will have a go at you if you say you don't vote. "If you don't go out and vote you give up your say on how this country is run!..idiot" It seems the common belief that a vote grants us … more

Coping With Muscle Spasm From tel1342 ^Pro in Back Troubles (6 days old)

* Pain and stiffness that doesn’t ease up within the first three days. * If a back or neck spasm is accompanied by tingling, numbness or weakness, see your GP immediately. What Your Symptom … more

Fry Missing Again! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (6 days old)

Stephen Fry, the quick witted butler in Jeeves and Wooster, and the 'Oxbridge educated' host of TV panel quiz game QI, has gone missing again, fuelling speculation that, this time, he may be gone fo… more

Trick or Treat! From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (6 days old)

Reports are coming in from all over the UK of children as young as 5 demanding money with menaces! Chief Superintendant Hal O'Ween said "I think these reports are very unlikely. There are very … more

Busy Bee From Jembajr ^Pro in The Sozzled Mumble (9 days old)

I am busy. I think that is all I have to say. Oh, and I have an interview next week for that job in town that I really, really want to get. :)… more

Eddie Izzard From Jembajr ^Pro in The Sozzled Mumble (12 days old)

Oh, I'm too ill to go see Eddie Izzard tonight. Says he. After months of looking forward to this gig he was hocking our tickets to friends on Facebook. :-/ Then Liverpool won their wee game. He … more

Thank Flibberyjibbit It's Friday From Jembajr ^Pro in The Sozzled Mumble (15 days old)

Started my theatre course on Wednesday. The cast of Cocoon turned up. :| Seriously, it was really very good. Although I was probably the youngest there by about 30 years. :)) We were joined by p… more

Masturbation to be Taught at all U.K. Schools. From tel1342 ^Pro in The Dead Synapses Society (16 days old)

Ed Balls MP, Secretary of State for Children, Schools and Families announced today that masturbation, or wanking as it's known to most young boys, will be required teaching at all schools in the U.K… more